Cold-Blooded Kindness: Neuroquirks of a Codependent Killer, or Just Give Me a Shot at Loving You, Dear, and Other Reflections on Helping That Hurts

Cold-Blooded Kindness: Neuroquirks of a Codependent Killer, or Just Give Me a Shot at Loving You, Dear, and Other Reflections on Helping That Hurts

David Sloan Wilson, Barbara Oakley

Language: English

Pages: 280

ISBN: 2:00249245

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub


In this searing exploration of deadly codependency, the author takes the reader on a spellbinding voyage of discovery that examines the questions: Are some people naturally too caring? Is caring sometimes a mask for darker motives? Can science help us understand how our concerns for others can hurt everything we hold dear? This gripping story brings extraordinary insight to our deepest questions. Is kindness always the right answer? Is kindness always what it seems?

From the Hardcover edition.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

pieces. Preliminary hearings are very different—they arrive early in the adjudication process, at that Wild West stage when the rules of the game are being decided. In a case like that of Carole Alden's, the stakes of the preliminary hearing are high. Depending on how the hearing went, Alden would leave the courtroom either a free woman or facing the prospect of life imprisonment. The objective of the preliminary hearing is not to establish whether or not the alleged culprit of the crime in

rooms, from the looks of it. This room, too, was in chaos—carpet barely visible beneath torn flaps of cardboard boxes, scraps of paper, plastic trays, and dirty clothes. A defunct oversized computer monitor sat forlornly on a desk, a disconnected keyboard on a chair cushion in front of it. Soda cans. A toy car. A horn. Propped against the wall was a ragged bureau with a missing top drawer. Lower drawers lolled out to reveal their contents: dirty plates, bowls, cups, and glasses. Apparently the

was every kind of animal you could imagine while we were together (or so I thought). Afterwards, there were many more. My kids would mention some of them when we spoke on the phone. I couldn't help thinking that the child support money I was sending was going towards buying exotic reptiles instead of buying food, clothing and school supplies for the kids.” ANIMAL HOARDING Wiry veterinarian Gary Patronek is perhaps the world's leading expert on animal hoarding. He and his colleague, social

control. Like it or not, certainty is a feeling—an emotion—not a rational conclusion. That feeling can lead you astray—as when you say hello to an old friend and find you've surprised a complete stranger. “Without a doubt,” as Burton notes, “is nothing more than an involuntary sensation of a perfect match.”6 As an illustration of how rational, “objective” knowledge and “felt” knowledge can collide, Burton points toward the Müller-Lyer optical illusion. On the one hand, we can see objectively

patients, and she became deeply involved with psychic channeler and self-ordained minister Jay Barham. “He has so much integrity,” she said. “The truth does not need to be defended.”12 Time magazine described the unfolding scandal as follows: Barham conducts group sessions where, he says, spirit entities materialize by cloning themselves from cells of his body. The entities are unusually interested in sex, sometimes pairing off the living participants for fondling or mutual masturbation. In

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