Not Taco Bell Material

Not Taco Bell Material

Adam Carolla

Language: English

Pages: 336

ISBN: 0307888886

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub


Now in paperback, Adam Carolla takes us back--before Loveline and The Man Show, before the Guinness World Record-breaking podcast and the New York Times bestseller In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks--to reveal all the stories behind how he came to be the angry middle-aged man he is today.

Funnyman Adam Carolla is known for two things: hilarious rants about things that drive him crazy and personal stories about everything from his hardscrabble childhood to his slacker friends to the hypocrisy of Hollywood. He tackled rants in his first book, and now he tells his best stories, debuting some never-before-heard tales as well.  Organized by the myriad "dumps" Carolla called home as a child to the flophouse apartments he rented in his twenties, up to the homes he personally renovated after achieving success in Hollywood, the anecdotes here follow Adam's journey and the hilarious pitfalls along the way.
     Adam Carolla started broke and blue collar and has now been on the Hollywood scene for more than fifteen years. Yet he's still connected to the working-class guy he once was and delivers a raw and edgy, fish-out-of-water take on the world he lives in (but mostly disagrees with), telling all the stories, no matter who he offends--family, friends, or the famous.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

that it happened at the “table” read. The next year when I did a pilot for NBC, I made the mistake of working with the same company that produced my CBS pilot. Overall it was a similar experience, an exercise in infuriation. The casting was miserable and included a battle, nay, a protracted war over casting my friend Oswaldo in the role of my friend Oswaldo (who, like Eddie/Nate, was briefly Rogelio and Eduardo). There was also the hilarious moment when we wanted to cast Amy Landecker, who was

us. At the end of the movie, Fred got up and said a couple words about what it was like on set. For Fred, brevity was the soul of wit. On the outing when I needed to dash to Loveline, we were watching True Romance and Saul Rubinek was there. Saul played the role of the coked-up Hollywood producer. The movie had started about twenty minutes late and True Romance is a little longer than you remember, and we were watching the director’s cut. I looked at my watch during the credits, at 9:33, and

stucco dust, and below was ten feet of space ending in the concrete staircase. Unfortunately, John isn’t as good a carpenter as me, and his jerry-rigged scaffolding collapsed. I could easily have wound up with a broken hip, elbow, and wrist and a hypoid saw embedded in my skull. But instinct prevailed, and I threw the saw into the house as the scaffolding gave way. I landed hard on my ass but managed to put one palm out in an attempt to break the fall. I limped away with a badly contused hand and

over and told him to get out. He flat-out refused, shouting “What for?” I was in the backseat the whole time laughing like a maniac. And the angrier Alex got, the harder I laughed. Ray also took a leak on Snake’s leg. This time we weren’t in a car; he did it under the table while we were eating at a breakfast place called Du-par’s. Urine by its very nature is the same temperature as your body. So when a guy opens up on you under a table, you don’t feel it until he’s done. So after Ray had

when he was passed out. Yet in 1988 he was named Citizen of the Year in the ultra-progressive/liberal hamlet of Santa Monica. It should also be noted that Dave was built like a jukebox dipped in creatine. So how did this not-so-lovable lug end up winning the hearts of the Santa Monica City Council members? One night after polishing off what Dave dubbed a Big Lush (a 7-Eleven Big Gulp topped off with a pint of dark Meyer’s rum), he decided a large pizza would be just what the drunkard ordered. But

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