Healing Developmental Trauma: How Early Trauma Affects Self-Regulation, Self-Image, and the Capacity for Relationship
Language: English
Pages: 320
ISBN: 1583944893
Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub
Written for those working to heal developmental trauma and seeking new tools for self-awareness and growth, this book focuses on conflicts surrounding the capacity for connection. Explaining that an impaired capacity for connection to self and to others and the ensuing diminished aliveness are the hidden dimensions that underlie most psychological and many physiological problems, clinicians Laurence Heller and Aline LaPierre introduce the NeuroAffective Relational Model® (NARM), a unified approach to developmental, attachment, and shock trauma that, while not ignoring a person’s past, emphasizes working in the present moment. NARM is a somatically based psychotherapy that helps bring into awareness the parts of self that are disorganized and dysfunctional without making the regressed, dysfunctional elements the primary theme of the therapy. It emphasizes a person’s strengths, capacities, resources, and resiliency and is a powerful tool for working with both nervous system regulation and distortions of identity such as low self-esteem, shame, and chronic self-judgment.
universe. They can skillfully: • Manipulate or maneuver others to do their bidding. • Seduce and charm: “I know what you need. I’ll take care of you.” • Exert a charismatic attraction. • Manipulate by presenting the image that will best meet their goals. The Overpowering Subtype The overpowering subtype develops as a result of the extreme helplessness these individuals have experienced in situations of abuse and horror. As children, their smallness, vulnerability, and dependency were used
early in life interfere with our capacity to feel connected and alive in the present moment. NARM helps build and expand upon our current capacity for connection to our body and emotions as well as to our capacity for interpersonal connection—capacities that are, as we will see, intimately related. Five Biologically Based Core Needs NARM recognizes five biologically based core needs that are essential to our physical and emotional well-being: the need for connection, attunement, trust,
experience, or both. When there is high arousal and dysregulation, it is painful to be in our bodies. This is why the NARM approach has added somatic mindfulness to the practice of traditional mindfulness. The purpose of somatic mindfulness is to progressively support nervous system re-regulation by adapting techniques from Somatic Experiencing® such as grounding, orienting, titration, pendulation, and discharge that are designed to address the high arousal, collapse, and shock states that
Lights on but no one home: indication of dissociation Darting eyes Looking without seeing Exophthalmic “bug” eyes The “long distance” gaze; diffuse focus Frightened eyes Disengaged Frightening eyes Impaired capacity to orient Excessive blinking Waxy, frozen quality to the eyes and face Tics Fixed gaze Hypervigilant eyes Sleepy eyes Predatory eyes Difficulty making eye contact TABLE 10.3: Impact of Trauma on the Eyes Your Mother’s Eyes Ideally, this exercise is done with a partner with whom you
was late on my project. I felt really criticized, even though I sort of knew I was overreacting. LARRY: Take a moment and ground yourself. CLIENT: Takes a deeper breath and sighs. LARRY: And from this perspective now, where you’re feeling more grounded, what do you see about your reaction to your boss? CLIENT: Chuckling to himself.… Feeling so good those first two days seemed too good to be true. LARRY: It sounds like you were expecting something bad to happen. CLIENT: It’s true.… In a way,